Sickness Versus Support

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I really wanted to attend my SHARE support group last night.  The meetings are bi-monthly and a chance for me to talk with other parents that have experienced pregnancy or infant loss.  When I attended the last meeting, the group was a mixture of parents with very recent losses (even only a few days prior) and others like me, who were further out.  It is also a chance to see the friends that I have made through this club that I never wanted to be a part of. Continue reading

They Were Included

Last April, my sister got married. I was the maid of honor, pregnant, constantly worried that I would lose the baby, as I lost Nelle and Iris in the two pregnancies before. I did the absolute best I could to be present, participate, while carrying fears that something would happen and ruin her special day. Her day came, and everything was fine. I used the portable heart-rate monitor to listen for the baby’s heartbeat in the morning, tracked movements throughout the day, and smiled through well wishes in the evening. The day following her wedding was the 24-week mark: medically significant because it was a marker of “viability” should something happen. Continue reading

A Shining Star

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Theo was Star of the Week in his second grade class. Last Friday he brought home a “questionnaire” including describing favorite foods and family traditions. He also needed to bring in five photos. Continue reading

When Mothers Are Hurting

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Yesterday, someone I know asked for advice on Facebook.  Her friend, 4.5 months pregnant, was told that her son would not likely make it to term due to a heart defect.  She wanted to help, but didn’t know how.  A friend brought it to my attention, thinking  I could offer some words, knowing that kind of heartbreak. Continue reading

Tell Your Story

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Let me tell you what I wish I’d known
When I was young and dreamed of glory
You have no control:
Who lives, who dies, who tells your story?
-From ‘Hamilton’

For the third time, I appeared before a group of hospital staff to tell my story of being a patient in Labor and Delivery who would not be taking my baby home. Continue reading